Greetings, neighbors, and welcome to the Beach City Buzz...There’s not a whole lot to celebrate this month (well, there IS my birthday - you DID remember, didn’t you? No? Well, not to worry. I’ve been somewhat successful at trying to forget it too). Let’s discuss what’s NOT to like about this month - besides it being my birthday month. You DID remember it was my birthday, right? OK, first there’s an unnecessary letter in it - who actually pronounces it Feb-RU-ary? It’s Feb-U-ary. So being simple minded as I am, there’s too much excess right there. The days are messed up. I mean, really - 28 days?? Leap year? What’s up with that? Why not distribute some of those days a little more evenly from the months with 31 days? My birthday always fell during school vacation week - so I never got to bring cupcakes to school to share with my friends because we weren’t IN school. Now if that’s not enough to traumatize a kid for life, then what is? There are some very odd celebrations in Feb-RU-ary. Oh, sure, there’s President’s Day and Valentine’s Day, but there’s also Groundhog Day. Great - I get to share my special month with a buck-toothed rodent who’s afraid of his own shadow. There’s Lent, when you figure out what it is that you enjoy most, and then decide to give it up. Now what fun is that? (Note - I am not anti-religion, so please don’t write in to tell me I’m going straight to hell. I’m simply not giving up my Double Stuff Oreos just yet.) Feb-RU-ary starts with the letter “F” as in “fat”, and it happens to be National Potato Month, so I will personally celebrate by eating an entire bag of potato chips, accompanied by a big bowl of dip, and then complain that I’m Fat. Meteors, asteroids, (and hemorrhoids?) tend to fall out of the sky more in Feb-RU-ary lately. One word - SNOW and COLD. OK, two words. They are both 4 letter words. Coincidence? I think not. Other reasons why Feb-RU-ary is a lousy month: The Oscars are coming up. I don’t go to the movies, and have no idea who (wait, I have to look up some names) Quvenzhané Wallis or Christopher Waltz might be. So while the movie buffs amongst us may be gearing up for all the “Bests of”, I’ll be snoring just as soon as the red carpet is rolled up and everyone’s in their seats. Feb-RU-ary Super Bowl = no Patriots. Plus I lost on my football squares, not that I played them, of course. BUT there’s at least a little good news to report! The Beach City BUZZ is on the way! AND it’s the Birthday Edition - you DID remember my birthday, right? Let’s get to the good stuff: Are you feeling lucky? How about taking a bus trip down to Foxwoods? Proceeds to sponsor Revere Kiwanis charities. The trip is run by the Revere Kiwanis Club and the bus leaves on Saturday, March 2. Enjoy coffee and donuts and a 50/50 raffle on the trip down, and a movie and refreshments on the way home. Cost in advance is $30.00 per person. Everyone will get $30.00 in vouchers, Free Buffet, $10.00 match, etc. Bus will leave from the Northgate parking lot on the Price Rite side of Charger Street at 7:45 a.m. and will leave Foxwoods at 5:00 p.m. Deadline to purchase tickets is February 25. Contact Donna at 781-289-6596 or Terry at 781-289-1604...Ran-dumb thoughts: Why do we expect kids to listen to their parents when Tarzan runs around half naked, Cinderella comes home at midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time, Alladin is the king of thieves, Batman drives at 200 mph, Sleeping Beauty is lazy, and Snow White lives with 7 guys. We shouldn’t be surprised when children misbehave, they get it from their storybooks! Why is it that the older I get, the more I enjoy being bored? Lite: the new way to spell “Light,” now with 20% fewer letters! I am such a math-a-phobe. Every time I see a math word problem, it looks like this to me: If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes will fit on the roof? Answer: Purple, because aliens don’t wear hats...The Revere “Seniors That Care Program” is looking for new participants on Thursday mornings at 10:00 a.m. at the Rossetti-Cowan Senior Center, 25 Winthrop Ave. in the Beach City. Volunteers are knitting blankets for elders and babies at various hospitals, nursing homes and homeless shelters. Even if you can’t knit, you may be able to learn how, and have a fun morning of socialization. For more info or to donate yarn, please call Lois Diamond at 781-286-8156. It’s a great way to make new friends, learn something new, and help those in need...That’s it for the BUZZ, BUZZers. Do whatever makes your heart sing, and remember: It’s true that money can’t buy happiness, but you can cheer up much faster sitting poolside in a lounge chair next to your oceanfront mansion...This week’s SMILEMAKERS: Rose LoGiudice, Tricia Seigal, Linda Nazzaro, Geo Gomez, Regina Matthews, Chris Masiello, Dan Allen, Renee Dunn, John Doherty, Joyce Kelly, Luz Garcia, Lisa D’Ambrosio, Howard Cook, Joe Singer, Gloria Lema, Annette Patti, Brendan Sullivan, Nita Ludensky, Patricia King, Joseph Noll, Robert Mansfield, Robert Belliveau, and Nicholas Buonopane...Heeere’s the CHUCKLE - Sven and Ole are back: Sven and Ole worked together and both were laid off, so off they went to the unemployment office. Asked his occupation, Ole said "Panty stitcher, I sew the elastic on to cotton panties." The clerk looked up panty stitcher. Finding it classified as unskilled labor, she gave him $300 a week unemployment pay. Sven was asked his occupation. "Diesel fitter," he replied. Since diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Sven $600 a week. When Ole found out he was furious. He stormed back into the unemployment office to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double his pay. The clerk explained: panty stitchers were unskilled and diesel fitters were skilled labor. "What skill?" yelled Ole. "I sew the elastic on, Sven pulls on it and says "Yep, diesel fitter."..Got comments? News? Announcements? Jokes? Suggestions? Want to congratulate someone on their anniversary, birthday, baby, divorce? Is your group running a fundraiser, meeting or event? Feb-RU-ary 25 is National Chocolate Covered Peanuts Day! Don’t be a Goober! Send us your BUZZ bits! Email AndreaRevere@aol.com or snailmail the BUZZ at PO Box 101, Revere, MA 02151, and read it in the REVERE ADVOCATE!