Greetings, friends, and welcome to the Beach City BUZZ. It’s only a matter of time (possibly months) until the piles of snow melt, the next last storm of the season has passed, and we’ll be seeing those tulips poking their heads up. Any minute now. Can’t be much longer, can it? Sure. Moving right along, we’ve got some interesting tidbits and mindless trivia for your waiting-for-spring reading pleasure: According to The Atlantic Magazine, between 2002 and 2010, a whopping 17,616 people went to the emergency room with zipper-related injuries to their private parts. (Now, let’s see, would the majority of those 17,616 be men?); The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named Volney; The names of the three wise monkeys are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Speak no evil); It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and $200 million to make a film about it; It is estimated that the cost of raising a medium-sized dog to the age of 11 years is $6,400; "I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. (Note: The longest sentence is “I do”); A 'jiffy' is an actual unit of time - 1/100th of a second; DNA stands for Deoxyribonucleicacid; The little statue on the grill of every Rolls Royce car has a name: "Spirit of Ecstasy”; (the grill on my Toyota Rav4 has a name as well - it’s called disgustingly dirty because I don’t believe in washing my car. Hey, that’s what rain is for!) The ball on top of a flagpole is called a "truck." The ridges on the sides of coins are called reeding or milling; The "O" when used as a prefix in Irish surnames (as in O’Riley) means "descendant of." And if that’s not enough information for you, here’s the BUZZ: Frank and Carol Haney’s daughter, Christine, owns a lovely gift shop called The White Lilac, located at 38 Union Street in Manchester-by-the-Sea. North Shore Magazine is publishing their list of “Best of the North Shore 2013”, and it would be fabulous if you’d vote for Christine’s shop. Visit www.Nshoremag.com, register to vote, and click on BONS2013 to nominate the White Lilac. Check out Christine’s website, thewhitelilac.com to see the beautiful items she sells. Good luck, Christine...I was at the ATM machine at the grocery store last week when an elderly man came up to me and asked me to help him check his balance - so I pushed him over...A couple of items from the City of Revere: (And we REALLY like this one!) “Starting March 30, 2013, residents will be able to use a mobile phone application, known as “Commonwealth Citizens Connect,” to report potholes, graffiti, and trash, as well as other issues requiring a city response. Through the Commonwealth Citizens Connect program, residents with a Smartphone will be able to instantly report a pothole, illegally-dumped trash, or other issues negatively impacting our resident’s overall quality of life. A link will be available starting March 30th on www.revere.org which will give residents more information about the program and how to download and use the application. To learn more information about the mobile app, call the Mayor’s Office at 781-286-8111 or email firstname.lastname@example.org”...The Revere Recreation Department will be holding a six-week basketball clinic for boys and girls in Kindergarten – 2nd grade beginning on Saturday, March 23 and ending on Saturday, April 27. Times are as follows: Girls - 1:00 - 2:30 p.m., Boys - 2:30 – 4:00 p.m. Pre-registration required. For information, call 781- 286-8190...Reminder: Cupid Splash this weekend across from Kelly’s on the Beach - Saturday at 10:00 a.m. (Benefits Save the Harbor/Save the Bay Beach Programs. Lots of prizes, lots of smiles. Visit www.savetheharbor.org...Got this BUZZbit, and it sounds like fun, so we’re passing it along: There's an acoustic open mic every Thursday night at 7:00 p.m., at Antonia's on Revere Beach Boulevard, hosted by Frank - who did his songwriting stint in Nashville (he says that he suffered for his art, and now it's your turn!). All genres are welcome with the emphasis on songwriting and interpretations of covers. Last Thursday, Tom Mann the Accordion Man played Irish classics, the Meat Man did his stand-up shtick, Snap and Mugsy added Cajun spice with their snappy originals, and Allen ended the evening with Beatles-inspired sing-a-longs. There are amps and
P. A. Be there or be square! Call 781-289-0698 to get on early...Ran-dumb thoughts: My friend Large Marge has a favorite quote. She says that, “Men are a lot like shopping carts. When you finally find one without a screwed up wheel, it already has a wife pushing it around.” Spring is an excellent reminder that I was supposed to get in shape before spring. I’ve been trying to diet and work out, but I’ve come to the realization that the only way that I’m going to get “smokin’ hot” is by being cremated. That’s it for the BUZZ, BUZZers. Do whatever makes your heart sing, and remember: Sometimes your knight in shining armor is just a nitwit in tinfoil...This week’s SMILEMAKERS: Candi Conley, Sarah Baker, Bianca Gregorio, Cathy Penn, Amanda Mendez, Robert Crowe, Jose Escobar, Kimberly Rosales, Tonia D’Eramo, Rosalind Murphy, Theresa Ortiz, Christina Puleo, Howie Taub, Tom Griffin, Joe Ravesi, Cheryl Kelley, William Lacey, Joe Hickey, Orlando Vazquez, and Cameron Berman. Sending best wishes to Revere Fire Department Senior Deputy Chief Michael Conley, Sr., Captain Robert DiSalvo, and Firefighter John Carroll, who are retiring from the Revere Fire Department at the end of March... Heeere’s the CHUCKLE: A husband and wife go to their favorite Chinese restaurant on their anniversary. They peruse the menu and agree to share the Chicken Surprise, which is that night’s Chef’s Special. The waiter brings the food, served in a lidded cast-iron pot. Just as the wife is about to start on the meal, the lid of the pot rises a tiny bit and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down. “Did you see that?” she gasps and asks her husband. He hasn’t, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two beady little eyes looking around before it firmly slams back down. Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening and demands an explanation. “Well, sir,” says the waiter. “What you order?” “We both chose the same,” he replies. “The Chicken Surprise,” “Oh, so sorry, this my fault,” says the waiter. “I brought you Peking Duck.”...Got comments? News? Announcements? Jokes? Suggestions? Want to congratulate someone on their anniversary, birthday, baby, divorce? Is your group running a fundraiser, meeting or event? Passover begins on March 25. Seder right thing and don’t pass over the chance to email AndreaRevere@aol.com...and read it in the REVERE ADVOCATE!